Bert and Ernie married

My Favorite Thing About Being Married Is…

Look at that title! In the radio business, we call that a teaser! In the field of prostitution, it’s an incomplete thought. A teaser in that field is a midget whore who only lets you look and does not let you touch.

Roloff Family
Someday Amy and Matt Roloff will be in a museum which does not allow visitors to touch or engage in flash photography.

I’ve been married for two months now. Thus far, it has been pretty good. I actually like it. I have someone to appreciate that I always put the toilet seat down. Being married to Jenny means I’m never the only one responsible for any fart noise complaints we may receive from the neighbors.

It’s tough to name my favorite part of married life. Saying I get to live with my best friend sounds too corny. I can eat and get really fat sounds nice, but it’s also not the direction I would like my life to go in.

Instead, I’d say my absolute favorite aspect in my marriage is how much more I’m able to learn from another person. Yes, it’s a little clichΓ©. I swear it’s not.

Bert and Ernie married
Bert and Ernie are maybe the most famous best friends who lived together. It was the best cover for the real reason they were under one roof…plotting acts of mayhem against the government.

Who knew girls poop? I didn’t until I was married. Also news to me: women don’t like wrestling magazines. You’d think they would adore the greased up muscle men of the WWE. As it turns out, women like Jenny prefer men like me who have bodies much closer to a WWE fan than superstar.

Our marriage is especially great for learning as we come from different cultures. Jenny loves Kit Kats yet never heard the jingle. That was one American thing I recently passed along to her.

On a similar note, I like women yet had no idea some are really men masquerading as such. That was one Filipino thing Jenny recently passed along to me.

You can never fully know another person. After 41 months of being in a relationship together, we’re still learning. In time, perhaps our deepest, darkest secrets will come out.

To save some time, my darkest secret is that some days I wake up and would prefer to stay in bed rather than go to work or run errands. Thankfully, Jenny has learned to love me despite my amazing flaws.

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